Home Inspirational PLAYING THE VICTIM = PLAYING SMALL, @YogaWithElle_

PLAYING THE VICTIM = PLAYING SMALL, @YogaWithElle_

by Elle

The Victim Mindset

It’s upsetting how many people play small with their lives, and it is not because they don’t want to achieve more and strive for greatness. But because of their victim mentality, their conditioning, their programming (often throughout childhood). This mindset would hold anyone back.

This victim mindset will make you feel as though you are struggling financially, professionally, personally (+in relationships). It will make you feel unhappy and unfulfilled. Blaming others for your current circumstances or blaming your past and allowing that to dictate your future gives away all of your power of control. You are the only person responsible for your life. And whilst some people don’t want to hear a hard truth, the beauty in that is that you also get to choose to change your current circumstances to create the life you want. If you don’t like where you are – move. Don’t over complicate it. 

Your actions and your habits will stem from what you believe about yourself, so you need to change that internal monologue. Notice the way that you speak to or about yourself. The way you speak to yourself is powerful and it will reflect in your day to day life. Manifestation simplified. If you always think negative thoughts you will attract negativity (not in a woo woo way) but what you’re looking for you’ll find. If you look for more white cars… you’ll see more white cars. Not because there are more on the road but because of what you’re focussing on and tuning into.


Be wary of what you are allowing into your life, you will become like the people that you surround yourself with. Notice who is throwing logs on your fire and who is holding you back. Negative people will drain the life out of you. Notice what you are listening to and make sure it is positive, motivating and inspiring. Turn off the news. Turn off down beat music. You’ll be surprised how much of a shift in mood you will have.

Become aware of the narrative that dictates your life choices and make a vow to change that. Take ownership for the decisions that you make. The victim mindset comes from the stories that we tell ourselves, ‘I’m not good enough’, ‘I can’t lose weight’, ‘My relationships always fail’, ‘I’ll never be rich’. When we delve deeper into those stories there is an underlying theme of blame – ‘my parents never had any money’, ‘we have a family history of obesity’. ‘My husband left me’, ‘I’ve always been this way’ ‘I was born into a poor family’. These stories that we tell ourselves give validation to the excuses that we give which stop us from achieving more.

If you keep telling yourself ‘I’ll never be rich because I was born into a poor family’ then you avoid the opportunities that you are faced with that would create a better money flow too. You charge less for services (which is connected to a low self worth). You are not a victim of your past! Your bank account is a direct reflection of your spending habits. Everything in your bank account is a result of how much you earn, and how much you spend. So simplify it. It’s not your past, you have the power to do whatever you want to do – it’s a choice that you make. Spend less or find another job that pays more, or both… but this is not a reflection of what you were born into. Take ownership of your own life

You want to lose weight? Move more. Calories in vs calories out. Simplify everything. It’s not always the family you were born into. It’s about being consistent. Change your eating habits, workout more. Set goals and achieve them.

When you start blaming everyone else for your circumstances then you give away your power. Take that power back. Take control of your own life. Hold yourself responsible and accountable for everything. It’s on you. You get to choose what routines you have. The habits you have. The decisions you make. Your life right now is a reflection of all of the decisions you’ve ever made, and you get to change your future too. So get out of your own way. 

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